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Where have manners gone!

I have decided that I am going to have to be more assertive when out with the double pushchair, not that it is in my nature to be aggressive in any way but simply because I can’t get from A to B if I keep giving way!

I know I am an exception to the rule, not many go out in triple buggy (although that was the early days, now poor BBhas to walk everywhere and he is only two and a half!) and I know that a double is cumbersome but seriously people can be so rude. I always say ‘excuse me,’ or ‘sorry wide load coming through’ (they can take that as they wish, the buggy or my rear!) and I always say thank you in usually a more than grateful tone with often a number of repeats.

Out and about in the early days!

So I was totally annoyed with myself after some silly 19 or even younger girl in Boots was rude to me and I scurried away as if I were to blame! Her and two other friends were deep in conversation down the middle of isle. I stop and waited, assuming they would see and move but no. I said ‘excuse me please, ‘ and still no response, ‘Excuse me’ I repeated louder and progressed forward a little. One of the girls caught sight and ushered the other two to the side while the very (annoyingly pretty) blonde hair girl went ‘Don’t mind me, you just run me over,’ with complete attitude! I then apologised for doing nothing wrong and scuttled to the door with BBin one hand cursing myself for not saying something to this little bitch.

To top of my trauma, as I get to the door I realise I it not automatic and now I am struggling to get both doors wedged wide open, while i push the double through and get BBout the door without making a grand escape, and you know what? Three, yes three people pushed past me at the door and did not even help me. Grrrrrr

Off to Tesco and I am waiting to find out fish prices for fish pie. The person in front of me places their order but does not say ‘Please’ or ‘Thank you’ when they have been served. It is like the people behind the counter are servants and therefore require no form of manners what so ever. How am I supposed to encourage my children to have manners when people day to day don’t demonstrate it?

Are people these days so wrapped up in their own little bubble that they fail to see what is going on around them? I believe so. Now I am sure I have on occasions been guilty of missing things, but seriously how hard is it to say please and thank you and assist somebody once in a while!

I know my situation is difficult including getting three so little in and out of a car. I have however, mastered a child on each hip, BBholding onto my cardigan, and locking the car door just to go the short distance into a building – the alternative is lugging out the buggy every time. If going to friends, they are great, they are usually waiting and  meet me at the door and take one child from me so I can back and get the others. The thing is they don’t travel light, babies do they?  My friends restore my faith in people. Them and the man who kindly parked my car after I got myself into a total pickle. I don’t usually let strange men drive my car but my Grandma and Kids were in it and I didn’t think he was likely to run away with them!

I know that some people feel that Mum’s of Dad’s with buggy’s feel like we own the street but seriously, I feel if we are not more assertive we could remain parked all day! So next time you out and you see someone with a push chair struggling with doors or steps, lend a hand, you will at least get a thank you!

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10 comments to Where have manners gone!

  • HerMelness Speaks

    You’re doing it wrong. Do not make eye contact and walk ahead purposefully. People soon move rather than risk crushed toes. Doesn’t even have to be done aggressively – that’s just a bonus depending on what mood you’re in.

    Repeat after me, eyes forward, now MARCH. :O

  • Kairen

    Lack of manners is my pet hate. I tell my children I may not be able to pass onto them great mathematical or spelling genes or lavish them with new clothes but I can install good manners and politeness as I do think these attributes can take them a lot further in life.

  • axh936

    The little bitch comment made me laugh out loud! So funny, I get this treatment a lot in Birmingham and when I took tom shopping he was far too polite and would have waited all day for people to nice if I hadn't bustled him through! But better be polite than rude :) I can't believe nobody helped you! Xxx

  • nicole

    I am completely with you on this one and i only have the one pushchair to deal with so i can only imagine how much more frustrating it is for you!!! I am quite lucky with Harry and his manners, even to the point where if someone is being rude, or says something 'naughty', Harry will pick them up on it!! He will nearly always use his pleases and thank yous without prompting and if anyone says 'ya' instead of 'you' he will correct them! If i accidentally swear, I get told off by him (and quite right too!!!), so I completely believe that although other people may not behave the way we would like, your children will still follow your example.

  • MuMuGB

    Poor you! It happens all the time and drives me mad. Young girls or women without kids are the worst ! I can't believe that the staff didn't help you!
    If it is of any help, eventually, they will understand!

  • Annette

    I want to slap those bitches in Boots!
    I don't want to sound like I have even the tiniest clue what it's like to have three small kids.. No double, or even triple buggy experience at all! However, I was reading that and I could just feel myself boiling up! Those arseholoes are everywhere! WHY!!!? You know what gets me the most, however, even more than people who won't let you by? People who just can NOT say "excuse me" in order to get by you and the buggy. This happened to me yesterday in Newcastle. This woman was making this big point of stretching right over, huffing and puffing all the way, making a real struggle out of it, to get to the cards on the shelf. I just looked at her, smiled and carried on. Because I just wanted to scream "SAY EXCUSE ME, AND I WILL MOVE!!" It's not hard, is it!?
    I think that some older generations (and I do stress SOME!!) simply forget what it was like to have kids… I mean, the prams back in those days were probably the size of someone's living room! So, I suppose you all carried your children everywhere, as to avoid other people's inconvenience!? Yeah, thought not!!!!
    A friend of mine has resorted to putting her head down, or funnier still, looking up at the sky in bewilderment, as she just charges on through the crowds! I remember thinking "how rude"! But I do now kind of see her logic! It is such a shame that people make others like this….
    However, it is nice (and this happened about half an hour after the struggling woman) when someone actually does remember what it was like! I was in McDonald's in Newcastle city centre yesterday, grabbing myself a quick burger for lunch (err well done, busiest time!), and was struggling to turn the buggy around and get away from the queue, when a lovely woman helped me and said "don't worry pet, we've all been there". I wish some others would remember that they too, had once been there……

  • TheBoyandMe

    It is a huge HUGE pet hate of mine. Hardly anyone nowadays seems to use basic manners and I find it shocking, and ever so slughtly worrying for our children's future!

  • Mummy and the Beastie

    You have to become hardcore when it comes to buggy etiquette. I am still amazed by how many people disregard buggies and see them as a nuisance. I now understand why it is necessary to ram ankles!

    I was the other day when leaving a post office (with a tricky door) and was approaching the door, a man in front of me opened it looked at me and just let the door slam shut. I was fuming so loudly I said 'what a lovely man', then I saw him waiting at the zebra crossing so I barged past and cut in front of him. Childish I know but I hope he got the point :-) x

  • Annette

    I want to slap those bitches in Boots!
    I don't want to sound like I have even the tiniest clue what it's like to have three small kids.. No double, or even triple buggy experience at all! However, I was reading that and I could just feel myself boiling up! Those arseholoes are everywhere! WHY!!!? You know what gets me the most, however, even more than people who won't let you by? People who just can NOT say "excuse me" in order to get by you and the buggy. This happened to me yesterday in Newcastle. This woman was making this big point of stretching right over, huffing and puffing all the way, making a real struggle out of it, to get to the cards on the shelf. I just looked at her, smiled and carried on. Because I just wanted to scream "SAY EXCUSE ME, AND I WILL MOVE!!" It's not hard, is it!?
    I think that some older generations (and I do stress SOME!!) simply forget what it was like to have kids… I mean, the prams back in those days were probably the size of someone's living room! So, I suppose you all carried your children everywhere, as to avoid other people's inconvenience!? Yeah, thought not!!!!
    A friend of mine has resorted to putting her head down, or funnier still, looking up at the sky in bewilderment, as she just charges on through the crowds! I remember thinking "how rude"! But I do now kind of see her logic! It is such a shame that people make others like this….
    However, it is nice (and this happened about half an hour after the struggling woman) when someone actually does remember what it was like! I was in McDonald's in Newcastle city centre yesterday, grabbing myself a quick burger for lunch (err well done, busiest time!), and was struggling to turn the buggy around and get away from the queue, when a lovely woman helped me and said "don't worry pet, we've all been there". I wish some others would remember that they too, had once been there……

  • Kairen

    Lack of manners is my pet hate. I tell my children I may not be able to pass onto them great mathematical or spelling genes or lavish them with new clothes but I can install good manners and politeness as I do think these attributes can take them a lot further in life.

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