I apologise in advance for this post as it is
mostly entirely about number 2’s or the fear of doing one! Do not read this if you are eating! I am however after some advice, which is why, I am choosing to discuss it.
So I got a phone call today from pre-school asking if I could pick one of my children up as they were very distressed. (I am not naming which child as this is personal – so we shall call them X) My child clearly needed to go for a number 2 and yet was saying that they wanted their own toilet and that it was ‘stuck’. X was very anxious and distracted and kept pacing back and forth to the toilet.
The staff thought X was constipated. I suppose it was the natural reaction. However X is not constipated at all, X is scared and we have had this problem for months now.
To be fair, we are not getting the same amount of number 2 accidents as we use to. X is actually sensing when s/he/ needs to go, more often, but s/he gets shy, can often refuse to go, is scared to strain or ‘push’ at all and often just holds it in. This results in the backlog, and then makes it very uncomfortable to go. This reinforces the fear it will hurt and the vicious cycle starts again.
Once in the privacy of their own home today we finally managed to get X to sit still long enough to go. By the time s/he had finished, you would have thought an elephant had produced it! No wonder it hurt…but without being too graphic it was not constipated consistency!
I am at a loss of what to do. How do I make this situation better and convince them it is not scary to go? I can’t lie about the pain, because with them holding it in, often it is painful.
I want X to be independent in regards to going to toilet. I am so sad about it; I can’t even see the funny side of this issue at all.
Any suggestions gratefully received!